As the little Fat Cat Saboteur floated erratically to the ground, his beady eyes never spotted the unexpected welcome committee waiting there to great him. It seems a dumpster fed Polar Bear had watched his slow descent. This bear was used to greasy, fatty, spoiled, fast food that he scavenged from the dumpsters of the oil companies, that ravaged his land. He gobbled the slimy airborne morsel with one bite, and then flossed his teeth with it's Chinese parachute.
This meal proved to be the bears undoing. First he became bloated and then had a tremendous bout of flatulence. Soon after, stricken with terrible cramps, he died. The bears digestive system couldn't handle the foul twisted bite of bagger. His bowls closed up tighter than a billionaires wallet. Even though the bears heroic deed went un-noticed by mankind, his sacrifice permitted the continuation of giving freely from the heart without thought of personal gain. Christmas was saved by the blocked bowels of a dumpster dependent polar bear nicknamed Tiny Tim.
God Bless us all.
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